Whether it’s cuffing season, wedding season, Valentine’s Day, or a regular Tuesday afternoon, everyone is always looking for love. It might not be the top priority for everyone, but we all desire to find someone we can spend the rest of our lives with. Women especially are looking for their Prince Charming, and while some women find love, at first sight, some women, on the other hand, have to kiss a few frogs before they find their king. In this age of social media where we lack communication and emotion, it's easier to find a fuckboy than it is to find the man of your dreams. Should you be concerned though? No, because we are going to improve every woman’s (and gay man’s) experience during cuffing season. We are cutting ties, changing standards, and focusing our energy into the right people. Here are the nine men you should avoid during cuffing season.
(1). The Man Who Loves You Last Minute
How does he act?: He doesn’t love you until you move on. You don’t need that kind of mind game sis.
Fictional Representation: Professor Oglevee from The Parkers. He didn’t love Nikki until she was ready to move on.
(2). The Man Who Shows Blatant Signs
How does he act?: He’s the guy who shows blatant signs he’s not interested. Let him go, sis, let him go.
Fictional Representation: Pretty much any black man in a Tyler Perry movie. They all show blatant signs they don’t care about their partners.
(3). The Man Who Has an Image to Maintain
How does he act?: He loves you, cares for you, and will treat you like a queen…as long as you fit his image, brand, and reputation. Whatever you call it, just know he doesn’t love you for you, he loves you for how you two look In public.
Fictional representation: Warner Huntington III from Legally Blonde. He had the audacity to break up with Elle Woods because he wanted to be taken more seriously in his legal career, only to get dumped, see both of his ex-girlfriend’s become friends, and Elle becoming the class valedictorian.
(4). The Man Who Wants a Cheerleader
How does he act?: He wants you to cheer for all his achievements, coach him through all his tough times, and give him guidance when he’s struggling, but as soon as you want to start making a name for yourself, all of a sudden that same energy isn’t there.
Fictional representation: Dru Hilton from Love Don’t Cost a Thing. He love Paris Morgan when he was able to cheat and lie to her, but once she realized she can’t be bought and she didn’t love him, he was left in his feelings.
(5). The Man Who’s a Hotep
How does he act?: Ahhh, I’ve seen these men in action. They will expect a black woman to have no weave, no makeup, no plastic surgery, and no European clothing, yet they believe everyone is from Egypt, the place where modern advances like surgery, make up, and wigs all began. They expect black women to be their idea of perfection while ending up to be with a white woman anyway. Hoteps are pretty much black men who want white male privilege.
Fictional representation: Shazza Zulu from A Different World. This man was telling black women how to act around campus to get a black man while never holding black man accountable. Before Derrick Jaxn, Umar Johnson, and Boyce Watkins, there was Shazza.
(6). The Man Who’s Prejudice Towards Women of Color
How does he act?: This man will throw black women under the bus just to put non-black women of color and white women on a pedestal. This man will even talk about women of color in general just to showcase his approval of white women. When you’re dating this man, no one wins in any situation.
Fictional representation: Brian from The Brothers. The man was didn’t date black women due to every stereotype you can think of, and of course, blame all his lack of love for black women on his black mother…and subsequently defended his black father who has the same pattern of actions…like every man of color who does this.
(7). The Man Who’s a Fuck Boy
How does he act?: This man will lead you on, say all the right things, and make the right moves to get whatever he wants from you, whether it is sexual or non-sexual. Now ladies be careful with this one, you usually can’t tell if he’s a fuck boy because of his disguise; good looks and impeccable fashion style. It’s a trap ladies proceed with caution.
Fictional representation: Lawrence from Insecure. After Issa put her financial and mental struggles to the side for him, Lawrence still treated her like sh*t after she gave him everything he needed.
(8). The Man Who’s a Misogynist
How does he act?: He still believes women are only good for cooking, cleaning, and birthing babies. He doesn’t like women who can do for themselves. He doesn’t like women who take ownership of their sexuality. He doesn’t like women who don’t need a man to make them feel whole. He doesn’t like it when women breathe. He just doesn’t like women.
Fictional representation: Peter Griffin from Family Guy. He could have honest conversations and moments with Brian, Chris, and his friends but couldn’t Lois and Meg to save his life.
(9). The Man Who Can’t Communicate
How does he act?: He has no idea how to verbal exchange his thoughts, ideas, and feelings to you. Whether it’s through text, phone calls, in person, social media, he doesn’t know how to effectively say what on his mind. He has a brick wall around his heart, mind, and mouth.
Fictional representation: Elton from Clueless. He never really listened to any woman. He literally only heard what he wanted to hear. Now that I think about it, Elton was Lawrence from Insecure before Lawrence.
What type of men do you try to avoid dating?